It may seem like a Honeymoon phase right after.
You will be so happy to feel loved again you will Get sucked in like I did. It won't go away that easily. I'm sorry to have to be the one to report it. His shame will get in the way of true healing as he won't want to speak of it and will take your love in return as a mixed signal. He will be like " YIPPE, she forgives me and I don't have to feel like crap for destroying my wife and kids!!" But it doesn't go away that fast and is always around the corner especially if he slips up by messaging or watching that smut again. One broken promise leads to another right?
It's beyond the hardest thing I have ever been through. So here is the only advice I can give at this stage:
If his lovey dovey stage was real and stayed I am sure we could have made it out. It was short lived though. Too much work I guess or not enough love.
If you hate your wife please do these things. It will break her heart. It will steal her joy. It will put her in a deep depression. Her life will turn upside down and even her children won't be able to snap her out of it. Yes, if you truly hate your wife do these things:
If you hate your wife by all means go on the dating site PlentyofFish.com
If you hate your wife make her think she's crazy by lying to her when she starts to suspect.
If you hate your wife definitely put a code on your phone and never let her have it.
If you hate your wife meet up with strange ugly chicks and do nasty things with them.
If you hate your wife leave early for work to see those ugly chicks.
If you hate your wife come home late and complain your too tired to be a part of the family.
If you hate your wife be sure to let her find out while you couldn't have a conversation with her you could have a conversation with the other chick. Be sure she hears about those hours of conversation from the other chick too. That will really drive the stake in.
If you hate her most def. suggest you thought her and the other home wrecker could have been friends and be dumb enough to actually believe it.
If you hate your wife be sure to only speak to her when she messes up.
If you hate your wife tell her she looks flabby.
If you hate your wife tell her she should wear more makeup
If you hate your wife tell her "are you going to wear that?"
If you hate your wife always tell her you don't want to talk about it when she is trying to have a passionate discussion.
If you hate your wife come home late constantly and feed her lies and yell at her when she questions them. Do this even when she cries, threatens to kill herself, or begs for the truth. Make her feel completely paranoid and crazy. This is a tip if you hate your children too as it will make her in such despair she can't possibly be a good mother.
If you hate your wife never take her side when she's upset. Always take your families side or random strangers.
If you hate your wife only be romantic when you want to get lucky and then four minutes later snore.
If you hate your wife tell her "you should be over this by now" or " why are you bringing that up again".
If you hate your wife continue messaging women and staring at porn after your caught and promise never to do it again.
If you hate your wife never hold her hand or put your arm around her in public.
If you hate your wife always critique her cooking.
If you hate your wife only show love when your guilty.
If you hate your wife buy her things to apologize and yell at her when she says that's not necessary.
If you hate your wife never fully confess your affairs and make her dug everything up one by painstakingly one.
If you hate your wife tell her how sorry you are when caught but keep doing what your doing because you don't want to hurt another woman's feelings.
If you hate your wife always disagree with her especially in public.
If you hate your wife take another woman to pick out pavers for your new house.
If you hate your wife change drastically from shy nice to douchebag mean.
If you hate your wife always cover your ears when she chews but not anyone else does.
If you hate your wife never laugh at her jokes.
If you hate your wife roll your eyes at her when you think she's too loud but cheat with an even louder chick
If you hate your wife make her feel like crap if she spews a curse word because we all know how perfect you are
If you hate your wife cheat with a redneck, smoking, cursing, fat chick so your wife can see you have no standards even when destroying your family.
If you hate your wife definitely tell her when she's upset or sad that she's just feeling sorry for herself.
If you hate your wife days, months, year into this nightmare always ask her "What's wrong now?" When she seems down as if it should be gone from her memory by now because that's what you would prefer.
If you hate your wife ignore the signs of depression because you know you put her there but would rather tell her she's always been crazy.
If you hate your wife be sure that even though she has scars all over from hives and the stress that still is with her you act like it's no big deal.
If you hate your wife make her feel bad for needing time to process her feelings after years of being lied to even when she asked all the right questions.
If you hate your wife never confess and openly say sorry and help her understand why you would behave and do such repulsive things with repulsive people.
If you hate your wife actually blame her distress on her looking and finding what you did.
If you hate your wife always ask her "What did you do all day?"
If you hate your wife never kiss her just because.
If you hate your wife don't dare be Godly in front of her or pray with her.
If you hate your wife def. Don't text her sweet things just because.
If you hate your wife never say she's a good mom.
If you hate your wife cheat on her for years, get caught, do it again, get caught, and more then when she asks for a break DONT GIVE IT TO HER, yell at her and tell her she should get over it and forgive you.
If you hate your wife yell at her if she ever wants to talk about what you did because that would make YOU too uncomfortable and might help her heal.
If you hate your wife get mad at her for her parenting decisions even though you are never there to make them.
Last but not least... if you hate your wife Always show empathy to other women, moms, home wreckers, etc and not your own wife.
If you hate your wife never hug her when she's upset even if you don't think it's a big deal.
SO MUCH More
But if you love your wife why don't you give her peace and quit throwing it back in her face because the thought of you doing all those nasty things and watching all those nasty things and even saying her name in bed has crushed her in every way! But you obviously don't love her truly or you would show your sorry and be apologetic consistently till she's had a chance to heal and can fully believe your truly sorry!
Or is your guilty mind worth more than your marriage?
Dude. Your destroying the mothers of your children by treating them this way so unless you HATE her STOP AND THINK ABOUT WHAT YOUR ACTIONS WILL CAUSE. Your children will see their mothers pain and the tension in the home. Your apologies could show them better values and that you mean it but keeping your mouth shut only makes you selfish!
Sincerely
Hurt wife.
Crushed wife
Damaged goods